1)
Fundamentalist christian nutjob loses dictionary and cannot define “Public Servant”: wants to impose her view of morality on gay couples & bugger the law. You don’t like the job or the rules? Leave. What next? Ambulance men refusing to treat Jews because “they killed our Lord”?
2)
US softens vegetables for later Chinese takeaway: the present evil empire doing the next evil empire’s dirty work? Nice, we love Western values too.
3)
Have you got that extra strong (Eye Bleach [tm]) handy? The stuff Geeklawyer sent you last xmas? Good. Apparently some twatty Muslim objected to a tranny giving his wife driving lessons. It seems muslim men don’t allow their property to be alone with other men. Achmed had a bit of a fit when he saw (WARNING: OFFENSIVE IMAGE) this thing (AKA “Emma” Sherdly) in the driving school’s car.
Tip: dilute the eye bleach 1:1 with water: you’ll lose 80% of your vision but it will be worth it as the image of whatever it is will be removed forever. Sorry about the eyes. Really.
4)
Social notworking site: Faceparty is, it tells us, “the biggest party on Earth”. Apparently you should “Log Ur Ass On”. The last time Geeklawyer heard crap like that it was from some sad old man pretending he was a decade younger. Ahem. Well, it seems they have a paedophile problem: lots of dirty old men trying to pull hot young chicks. Solution? Ban anyone over 36. Mercifully someone is thinking of the children. Geeklawyer will worry when this affects him in 10 years time.
Oh just fuck off, OK?
5)
The shifty, evasive & suspicious editor of Blawg Review, who — Dan Hull assures solemnly — wears silk women’s underwear, has just IM’d Geeklawyer to tell him that English court transcribers cannot understand Scottish, and as a result they render the transcripts into gibberish. To Geeklawyer’s US readers who might scoff, he would say that one merely has to discard the sound of “Scotty” from Star Trek and instead watch the hilarious Rab C Nesbitt — the greatest living Scotchman — to understand why this is not only forgiveable but entirely reasonable.
6)
Apparently, fucking weird pint sized definitely-not-homosexual shit actor Tom Cruise’s money making hobby Scientology has persuaded the corrupt City of London police to shut up its critics because even though $cientologists “value free speech” they feel insulted by being called a “cult”. A timely lesson to politicians about the pernicious unintended consequences of free speech being constrained by laws introduced to attract cheap votes. Blair, you were an asshat & your wife is a minger.
White lightning or mead?
Have you been to Moscow to watch some football?
Erm, mead.
Ah gorgeous geek you have returned from mars. Could you please hop on over to my blog and give us your rude, scathing, bitter yet erudite views on my latest post, as your current one is quite relevant. That goes for you too actually Don Charoni!
I am a bit upset as I don’t really know whether I am happy that Chelsea lost or angry that smug twonk Fergie couldn’t look any smugger. Arsenal were robbed this season. Again.
At least I have to wait til august for it all to begin again.
TATA
My Dear Geek,
The plod certainly are a bunch of stupid cults. Has Boris commented on this?
I take exception to your description of Blair. This was an insult to asshats.
Cults have got to take on board that they shouldn’t expose themselves to public ridicule if they can’t take a joke.
Has the homophobic registrar thing been sorted out yet? Surely it is as simple as you suggest, GL — if she refuses to make some legal unions, she’s unfit for purpose and should be fired, preferably out of a cannon. It’s no different from doctors and contraception and all the rest of it — one of the reasons they get paid so much is that they have to set their own prejudices aside in the patients’ interest.
Odd, isn’t it, that these things appear to be acceptable; barristers would attract baying criticism if they refused to take on the defence of, say, a rapist on ‘moral’ grounds.