It seems that some things burn eter­nally and can­not be extin­guished by the efforts of mere man: the under­ground coal fire that rages in Penn­syl­va­nia that has burnt for 46 years and is still going strong; or the obses­sion of Geeklawyer’s grow­ing band of female stalk­ers (and the odd male one we’ll gloss over quickly).

All of these pale beside the ambi­tion of the ex-Dear Leader. Hav­ing bug­gered up the coun­try nicely by cre­at­ing new breed­ing grounds for hatred of the West, and gifted an entire gen­er­a­tion of angry young Eng­lish Mus­lim men to rad­i­cal­ism; hav­ing launched us into a sup­port­ing role in retarded George’s democ­racy tour of the Mid­dle East — crit­i­cally panned by Rolling Stone mag­a­zine; hav­ing erad­i­cated at a stroke vast swathes of the civil lib­er­ties he said were the rea­son we were a great lib­eral democ­racy supe­rior to the ter­ror­ist val­ues; hav­ing trashed the Health ser­vice into a semi-privatised profit cen­tre for health com­pa­nies and which employs reams of highly paid middle-managers whose func­tion is to churn out empty sta­tis­tics about the great improve­ments and, well, you get the point. Blair is a oily sleazy lit­tle runt; a failed bar­ris­ter with a chip on his shoul­der that would save the Amazon.

But of course all that was sup­posed to be over with his exit from power. Oh blessed day when the clouds parted and the rain retreated to be replaced by the mild driz­zle of the chubby, absolutely het­ero­sex­ual, thingy … Gor­don Brown, Google informs Geeklawyer.

We have been conned. Bliar has not had enough. With his obscenely lucra­tive rewards for doing a bad job, you’d think he’d be happy rolling around on £50 notes on his king sized bed with that fat arsed minger Cherie (embar­rass­ingly, a mem­ber of Geeklawyer’s Inn). £250,000 a pop US speak­ing gigs, £1Mil a year for a part time job, £6Mil book deal.

No. Appar­ently now he wants to bug­ger up the EU too by becom­ing PM of the EU. Eeeeek. He’s been caught lunch­ing the almost equally repel­lent French clothes horse PM Nico­las Sad­Dozy at the Paris restau­rant Thiou. A word of warn­ing Sad­Dozy: avoid doing deals with Bliar in restau­rants. Ask Gor­don.

Thiou are famed for an exotic meat and noo­dle con­coc­tion known as ‘le tigre qui pleure’ (the tiger who cries). In hon­our of the oily one’s visit can Geeklawyer sug­gest a new dish? “The Voter Who Weeps”. Geeklawyer’s French is too poor to ren­der that into French — in French he can only say “Get off my ski lift you Nazi-collaborating frog eat­ing Gal­lic tam­pon or Geeklawyer will have coprophilic sex with your dis­gust­ing wife after he’s bathed her and made her shave her armpits”.

Why oh why oh why oh why can’t the use­less rag-head pil­locks in Al Queda assas­si­nate him? It would be great PR for them: many of us would revise our low opin­ion of them if they could do us this one small ser­vice. Their inept­ness is proof that the ter­ror­ism ‘threat’ is laughable.

update: Some idiot is try­ing get Geeklawyer pros­e­cuted. Hilar­i­ous! Please read the blog, please, it is absolutely frig­ging hys­ter­i­cal. I’ve never seen a polit­i­cal stalker before but I think that that is what this per­son is. He has no inter­est in pol­i­tics and is a right wing loony. From his poor inar­tic­u­late writ­ing and weak argu­ments he is clearly not very bright and is man­i­festly poorly edu­cated — ideal Neo-Labour fod­der. I am assum­ing, from the tone, that the inter­est in Tony Bliar is a homo­sex­ual one.