Geeklawyer’s many fans girlfriends ex-girlfriends and stalkers have been besieging him for hints as to desirable xmas with which to win (or win back) his heart.
In order of desirability here goes:
1) A filthy month in the Alps with actress Jordana Brewster a video camera a box of sex toys and another compliant female (for a supporting role):
2) Bentley Continental GT:
3) Aston Martin DB9
4) a crate of Moniak Mead (droool):
5) An iRiver x20 MP3 player:
6) For the skinflints (& that won’t be forgotten) - a subscription to New Scientist.
My Dear Geek,
Your present list is nothing more than a blatant attempt to attract web-traffic.
Good luck in the Alps:you may be out of training.
I’m a bit surprised to hear you state the blindingly obvious. I normally have Ruthie to fulfill that role.
I have added Adsense tags - this will piss off Thomas Otter unfortunately but I do need the money to keep warm - even the deepest doorways are icy cold this time of year.
As for the Alps I am a little out of training but I am doing lots of press-ups in preparation.
An admirable list, Geeklawyer - I hope one day to have friends with sufficient means that I can draw such a list up myself.
I think you’ll find that the Aston you’ve pictured is a DB9, however. Would it be overly cynical of me to suggest that the items marked 1 on your list (or ones similar to them) might follow if you received an Aston Martin and proceeded to park it in strategic places? It is a car, as the philosopher Clarkson once remarked, that can ’snap knicker elastic at 20 paces’.
Happy Christmas.
oops yes thanks - DB9 is right.
And yes you are 100% right. If Jordana wants a pupillage I can guarantee a fully funded 12 months plus a tenancy. Even if I have to kidnap the pupillage & tenancy committees kids in order to do so: I am entirely without scruples morals or the natural limitations of decent men.
Hmm, you might have a terrible taste in actresses but you certainly know your meads. Moniack, oh transport me…
‘terrible’??!
I appreciate tastes vary but anyone who can suggest Jordana is less than a goddess is more evil than the bastard child of Hitler & Stalin.
I would have to concur with you, she is a very beautiful woman. Andy is just blind.
If *I* was to give you a Xmas pressie would be something along the lines of knitted slippers.
Huzzah!!!! Mary
Glad you are well enough to play.
Yes, Andy is *insane*. Knitted slippers? Hmmm, well I’d try to be diplomatic if I got them. Yes I can be diplomatic.
*Immediately bins lurid Lime Green Tie wrapped in a three month old copy of the Daily Star purchased from the cheap bin at Tie Track*…….
You’d spend your 12 months of pupillage photocopying if you gave me that!
Well, it was either that, or a pair of mis-matched socks…….
( I happen to find Photocopying quite cathartic, by the way….)
My Dear Geek,
I was alluding to your recent attempts at attracting traffic. It is quite a change to post a picture of a young lady, instead of ‘Arse Raped….Barrister does it for £200′.
Funny, number 1 was on my list too…
You can have her after I’ve broken her, Boxing Day is usual for my new toys.