Geeklawyer was in court last week. And he had handed up a skeleton argument to the judge that was of a mildly humorous tone, and he really does mean mildly; it was no blog post. He was fortified by the fact that it was the litigant in person who was speaking not himself (complex - don’t ask) so he wasn’t going to cop it if it went wrong.
And then, as the LIP spoke, Geeklawyer could see His Lordship scanning through the skeleton to about the page wherein lay the humour. Let it be stressed here, again, that this was mild humour.
Curious as to the identity of the barrister who’d drafted it His Lordship asked:
“Who is Mr XXX?”
LIP:
“There, My Lord.”,
pointing to an armed, sorry alarmed (though at that moment a pistol would have been most welcome), Geeklawyer. Your author stood, nodded to His Lordship. And sat down while his panic rose. He really didn’t fancy a visit to Geoffrey Vos’ Star Chamber again.
The strangest thing then happened.
His Lordship began smiling. It was slight that’s true. But it was smiling: the corners of his mouth turned upwards perceptibly in that way that isn’t a frown. And his clerk agreed afterwards, it was definitely a smile.
Geeklawyer thinks that all present felt a slight fearful chill run down their spines.
Note to self: no more humour in skeletons please. Ever.
Ruthie has promised Geeklawyer, in the event that he secures a tenancy at 8 New Square http://www.8newsquare.co.uk she will marry him.
Ruthie was confident when she made this promise that there was more chance of Menzies Campbell winning the next general election, than such an event coming to pass, but this recent court activity is worrying.
(P.S. If you are the head of the tenancy committee at 8 New Square I can’t even afford to bribe you not to do it.)
Incidentally in the event that Geeklawyers blog ever becomes a full length motion picture, the “Geeklawyer in the Star Chamber” scene should be good…
Ruthie has promised Geeklawyer, in the event that he secures a tenancy at 8 New Square http://www.8newsquare.co.uk she will marry him.
I have decided to become a gay. And a rubbish collector. That should keep me safe from this hideous prospect.
And if that fails I am preparing some ground glass to swallow. It will be a slow painful way to die, but in relative terms painless and swift.
Master Greeklawyer,
As you have made it clear that you were not actually speaking when this traumatic incident occurred, it seems to me that your Judge is probably sick. You must contact him immediately and insist that he seeks appropriate medical attention.
It sounds as if he has a psychiatric condition, but it may equally be tardive dyskensia. For Heaven’s sake, act at once!
If it wasn’t the remembrance of my humour that made him smile then you may well have it; look at the symptoms:
involuntary movements of the face … smiling…,
involuntary movements of the … legs, such as … tapping the feet,
grunting.
On the one hand decency requires me to help him as you say, on the other hand a loony judge in the Strand has comic potential. And the next time I may be speaking.