Having failed to attract the faintest hint of interest in his last competition Geeklawyer thought he’d have another go. I mean, Jesus how hard is it to give away free fucking whisky?! Quite hard, apparently.
So, the competition:
Geeklawyer has always been a bit puzzled by the Bar Council’s website graphic:
One assumes the BC paid some creative £100k to think it up and Geeklawyer would like to know where his subscriptions went.
The picture seems to be some ethnic looking at his watch while hastening over Tower Bridge. Clearly he isn’t a barrister since he appears to be a) hurrying and b) lugging a shoulder bag (Geeklawyer was always told in the sternest words “barristers do not carry briefcases” and extended this rule by analogy to all forms of valise).
The fact that he is black isn’t a disqualifying feature since Geeklawyer is informed on good authority that coloured people are now welcome at the Bar, along with women, apparently.
So is he a barrister? and if so what is he thinking/doing? As per the last non-competition the best answer gets a bottle of whisky. Though, if you think it’s is going to be a �4000 bottle of Bowmore Island Malt from the Luvian people be assured that you are very wrong.
Update: Ruthie & I will decide this one on the 10th of this month.
Update2: Competition won by Hoddy wit: ‘Christ, better hurry: they’re dragging Blair on a hurdle towards Marble Arch — the crowds will be three deep all along Holborn.’
“What?! I get him acquitted and he repays me by stealing my watch?”
The background looks more like Brooklyn Bridge than Tower Bridge to me.
Thinking to himself: ‘mm.. if time is money, even as I blur to passers by it’s cost me £3 to cross that bridge’
‘Well that’s the charges set, now I have five minutes to get out of here’
Of course all terrorists are darkies so this must be what’s going on.
damn dyslexia.….
I took the liberty of spell-checking it for you
Bridge Man: ‘Yikes i’m late again Ruthie will whip me’
At the moment if I can get away with a mere whipping I’ll be lucky
Indeed. I was thinking of slowly removing your innards with a teaspoon and a fish hook.
(Note to readers: Geeklawyer has upset Ruthie. Again. But this time its serious.)
A teaspoon wouldn’t work too well — sharp edges is the clue here.
If you wanted to be really sadistic you could come and stay with me for a week and talk to me a lot — but even you aren’t that cruel
uh I think you’ll find torture is far more effective with a blunt instrument..
I think it kinder to you not to introduce the topic of your intellect in this post. And you would be wiser not to incite me to do so. (‘Uh.’)
Bridge Man: “Ah ha.. you cad, I have you in a headlock now.”
Invisible Demon of Obtuse legislation: “argh.. no.. the Minstry of Justice will hear of this outrage.”
Captions:
“While I’ve been crossing this bridge, Blair has passed two new laws.”
A Solicitor from Southwark hastens to get to El Vino’s before his lunch guest, a Barrister, can get there and put a bottle of the best Claret on the bill.
“Mustn’t hurry too much, I’m billing travelling time on this one.”
Impoverished Bar Council use irrelevant image on website to save money for massive Christmas ball.
‘Christ, better hurry: they’re dragging Blair on a hurdle towards Marble Arch — the crowds will be three deep all along Holborn.’
Hoddy
Excellent!! front runner so far.
‘”Shit my control order states I have to be home at 7”’
‘Law Council infringes copyright in UNISON photo theft.’
‘Barrister flees from Cutty Sark in suspicious circumstances’
‘Home Office civil servant rushes to shred ID card report’
‘Q mistakes Barrister for Bond in Laser watch mix-up’
‘Producer of new London 2012 logo flees in shame’
‘Law Council Webmaster discovers photoshop blur effect’
‘Law council mole is late in delivering Polonium-210’
‘Blair Aide flees dawn raid in cash for honour row’
‘Motorcycle courier swerves to avoid Barrister’
‘Congestion charge forces legal clerk to walk to work’
‘Man complains electronic wrist tag an invasion of his civil liberties’
You’ve really got nothing to do, have you?
I’m an office worker, it is therefore my role in soceity getting payed to read blogs and eat cakes all day.
Damn — you really want that whisky!!
Yea but Hoddy’s “While I’ve been crossing this bridge, Blair has passed two new laws.” is the funniest so far
Jesus… this fucking bridge is falling down… I’m late… my gilrfriend is shagging a Silk.. . and I can’t run properly because some fuckwit in Chambers put Cialis in my coffee this morning.
Honestly, can one do better than the tag they’ve used themselves? “We hope you enjoy”?
Irrelevant? And?
I’m not buying the damned Bar Council whisky. They’ve had enough champagne and 5 star hotels out of my fees over the years to make giving them whisky an intolerable insult.
“Arrrgh I can feel the rage virus setting in!!!”
Eegads! Is that the hour? I appear to be slipping through a hole in the fabric of spacetime…
Becky!
, wow!
I’ll see if I can persuade Ruthie to second my vote for you to be the winner
Now all I have to do is get you to write for me.
I credit Becky with more intelligence than that. I’m just gullible.
I think we’ve both agreed that that is indeed your problem
But you can’t blame me for trying to recruit an uber-babe who can write too — you’re just here as eye candy
‘Geeklawyer tries to sneak a casual peak at the Bar Council’s CCTV drone that’s been following for the last 15 minutes’
‘Geeklawyer tries to sneak a casual peak at the Bar Council’s CCTV drone that’s been following him for the last 15 minutes’
And it was shameless copying of you — I confess it.
Hey GL…absolutely delighted… I can’t really enter my own caption competitions.… the more the merrier as far as I am concerned.
Bizarre picture for the Bar Council to use. Do you think they employed the same agency that designed the new olympic logo?
I’m now far too cowardly to mock the Bar Council openly. I offer the competition as an exercise in abstract humour or impliedly constructive criticism, whichever is more convincing