Court pleasures two footballers with a vibrator

IPKat reveals via the BBC that a Hamburg court has awarded £34k, about a months wages apiece, to two footballers who’s names were used in vain to promote a World Cup vibrator. Michael Ballack and Oliver Kahn apparently. Never heard of them, but then football is for chavs, unlike the manly gentleman’s game of Rugby, so Geeklawyer has an excuse.

Well, another excuse anyway: he and Ruthie have noted that sex in the storyline gets high numbers of hits. duh.

So we thought we’d do a litigation competition: the worst litigation pun on this story wins a bottle of whisky.

Come on: ‘vibrators’ ‘interim relief’ how hard can it be?

Obviously we’ll need a legit email to arrange your reward (delivered in a brown paper bag - no-one need know how you won it)

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10 Comments »

Comment by James
2007-05-16 11:05:45

What type of whisky?

I’m not some alcoholic hack from a redtop, willing to debase themselves with vulgar puns for the measly recompense of a bottle of teachers in a paper bag. Knowing Geeklawyer a few swigs will have ‘gone missing’ in transit as well (unless he is on good behavior trying to prove his constraint to Ruthie). Especially when these puns would simply be feeding your cravings for sex-related viewing ratings and the Google add related income they bring.

I’m a classy pun whore and although I don’t expect you to be able to afford my tastes I’ll settle for at least an 18 year old single malt from the Islands. :lol:

 
Comment by Ruthie
2007-05-16 11:29:51

I noted with interest that Dan made a point of stressing by way of comment that he doesn’t drink. People dont get to be senior partners of commercial law firms cos they is stupid…

Comment by James
2007-05-16 11:54:17

A man cannot make him laugh - but that’s no marvel; he drinks no wine

Comment by Geeklawyer
2007-06-04 09:24:07

That Shakespeare eh? He knew what’s what.

 
 
 
Comment by Dan Hull
2007-05-17 00:42:27

But I would drink if I could….it’s just that I am retired. People should drink if they can. But the real pros eventually get done in by the stuff. It’s Zen.

Comment by James
2007-05-17 10:07:07

Well as long the Bat was hung up after a good innings.

 
 
Comment by Dan Hull
2007-05-17 18:55:50

Oh yeah.

 
2007-06-03 22:13:22

[…] failed to attract the faintest hint of interest in his last competition Geeklawyer thought he’d have another go. I mean, Jesus how hard is it to give away free […]

 
Comment by Nick L Dime
2007-06-04 09:15:43

Hi GL,

Did think of submitting - but if wishes were horses, this beggar would ride - ‘Official: German Football is Not Sexy’ says Bundesliga Spokeman!

Tried to rethink but the grind ground me down. Keep up the sterling work and if there are any IT casts offs….. :lol:

Comment by Geeklawyer
2007-06-04 09:26:41

Now, you see, that’s not bad and it would have won. But you didn’t try.
Faint heart neer won fair whisky though …

 
 
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