Geeklawyer often wishes he was obscenely rich. Until that glorious event comes to happen he will have to settle for merely being obscene. And rich.
Buuuut, then again. Look at Tom Cruise.
No really, do look or this post won’t make any fucking sense.
Tom Cruise is of course a shit actor. And he’s short. The only way he could be worse is if he were a ginger. Let’s consider some of the films & TV he’s done:
- Mission Impossible 1 to 10: bollocks.
- War of the Worlds: Also bollocks.
- Austin Powers Goldmember: Nearly ruined the film and he only had a 2 femtosecond cameo. So, bollocks then.
- Rain Man: A film about a retard and a slimey sociopathic manipulator. No he didn’t play both parts and it wasn’t a biography. It was, however, bollocks.
- Interview with a Vampire: it certainly sucked. Bollocks really.
- Dick in and the Other Guy: where he played the guy in the closet on the couch. Bollocks, but — and let me be clear here — not gay bollocks because Tom has denied being gay. Geeklawyer definitely believes him.
Geeklawyer happened on a wonderful site that parodies the height challenged one. Oddly, Tom Cruise doesn’t quite get the joke and has set his private religion on them. By which is meant, of course the Scientologists ™. This hybrid quack religion/multilevel marketing scheme appears to have cropped up in relation to Mr Cruise on a couple of occasions. Apparently some Hollywood film figures have been surrounded and harangued by groups of weird shouty people after the said Hollywood figures had clashed with the Totally Heterosexual Homunculous. There may be no connection, and Cruise denies any, but it’s an odd coincidence that Geeklawyer doesn’t entirely buy.
Anyway. His lawyers have sent the site a not entirely positive critical review:
“You are hereby on notice that the registration and use of this domain name in this fashion has caused your name to be falsely associated with our client’s registered mark, Scientology.
“The fact that you have changed one letter (“m” instead of “l”) does not protect you from trademark infringement.”
The owners have declined to surrender the site and told Mr Cruise:
“get a stool, bring it over here, stand on it and throw your best punch at our knees. We can take it”
Geeklawyer’s mother has Alzheimer’s disease and is a bit ga ga. Nor has she ever read a book on law. However on her own and in her debilitated state she could certainly thrash a bus load of Cruise’s shiniest and most expensive lawyers in any action for trademark infringement passing off or domain hijacking. Their case is that rubbish.
Sometimes obscene money creates a reality bubble. It makes talentless people humourless pompous egotistical and self-important.
Best then that Geeklawyer isn’t obscenely rich: it would be a shame if any of that ever happened to him.
Love creates a reality bubble. It makes hopeless people cheerful generous caring and invulnerable.
Love or money? No contest.
Well, they do say money can’t buy you happiness.
But I say that that’s because you’ve been looking in the wrong shops.
Corporate Blawg: Something you need to tell us??
I seem to recall that a journalist set up his own religion on the net a couple of years ago called “Follow me”. It was done not entirely seriously, but within a short space of time he had a massive following. Its basic tenent was a requriement to do one good deed for another person every day. At the point when he finally closed the project down he was deluged with tales and photographs of people who had been helped. That must have been a good feeling. I’ve always found that when I’m feeling miserable it helps to find someone with more problems and try and help them. It helps to keep things in perspective.
Here’s the basic tenents of Ruthology: 1. Do regular gentle exercise 2. Eat green vegetables 3. Be nice to people. Do these things my friends and I can almost guarantee your lifespan and hapiness quotient will increase.
I’d also say send me money…but I fear that plenty of other religions have already got the monopoly on that one. I would however love to establish a fund one day for poor students who want to become lawyers. Its so incredibly difficult now for aspiring lawyers who don’t have money behind them. If just a few people could be helped it would make a real difference to the future of the profession.
If anyone reading this is interested in helping me set something up, please get in touch. I fear at the moment I’m too busy to manage it properly. But any expressions of interest would be welcome
As a student and trainee I was so poor that I often relied on the generosity of the barristers I instructed to get a meal. One evening, dinner would be the staple of tinned sausages and beans from Aldi, next evening I’d been dining with a barrister at the Ritz. A surreal existance, but I’m very grateful to the generosity of the barristers who got me through. I’m not sure that they all realised what a difference it made.
To Geeklawyer: still haven’t learned to spell wierd I see. I’m going to make you write it out ten times if you’re not careful.
Nope.
Love is all that matters. If you give it you get it. It’s free and more valuable than gold. We know it as children. We learn it as adults… that kind of message.